T&A (Individual Retirement Accounts)

Tits & Ass [Individual Retirement Accounts]
Ahh, the ever infamous question, “are you an ass man, or a boobs man?” It’s time to start enjoying both – the RIGHT way! We’re going to talk retirement (401k), IRAs (Traditional & Roth) and how using both can help you whoop taxes in the asses! It doesn’t matter if you’re a guy or a gal – you can still enjoy a nice pair of T&A, am I right?


 We’ll call Traditional IRAs the boobs and Roth IRAs the ass… not just because I prefer Roth IRA’s. One’s not necessarily better than the other, they’re both awesome. Here’s a sweet breakdown to help us get started:

Check out more from Business Insider here. Note: published for 2016, some rules may change for 2017*
Simply put:

  • Traditional IRA is pre-tax: you have not been taxed yet, you will be taxed when you use $ to retire
  • Roth IRA is post-tax: you have been taxed, you have $2,500 in the bank, and you put it into a Roth

Dirty Little Secret:
Do you like what you see? It’s time to stop thinking boobs or butt, and start thinking boobs AND butt (T&A)! Can you invest $5,500 in tits and $5,500 in ass – No. You can, however, invest in your 401(k) AND your IRA. If your work retirement plan is traditional, consider diversifying through a Roth IRA account as well. Diversification in Traditional and Roth accounts will help you navigate taxes when you’re ready to retire.

Example: retiring at age 60 and we need $50,000 per year-

  • If you pull $37,950 from your Traditional IRA, you’ll pay taxes on the $37,950
  • You can supplement the $12,000 remaining with your Roth IRA, which you will not owe taxes on (*as long as you meet account requirements).
  • Assume there’s a tax bracket increase at $37,950 – you are using the Roth IRA to avoid bumping your $ into higher tax brackets
    • Importance is that you save 10 cents per dollar… also known as $1,000 per $10,000 taxed
      • 15% taxes on every dollar means you keep 85 cents per dollar
      • 25% taxes on every dollar means you keep 75 cents per dollar

P.S. Check out BroBible to find out what liking T or A says about you.
“Don’t get me wrong, I’d withdraw all the money out of my 401k to graze Kate Upton’s side-tit, but I’d steal from my mother to have…”

3 thoughts on “T&A (Individual Retirement Accounts)

  • February 13, 2017 at 8:29 pm

    Didn’t know I could read about tits and my 401k in the same sentence. Interesting idea

  • February 15, 2017 at 7:50 pm

    Looks like I need to pay more attention to the back end or the Roth end. Thanks for the info!

  • February 16, 2017 at 7:40 am

    Pretty funny blog along with some good advice, worth the read especially since its fast and easy


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