Know Thy Self
Why is happy the new rich? Well, the old saying “money doesn’t buy happiness” is a good start. Whether you’re working, enjoying hobbies, or studying for your next exam… it’s very important to understand the true purpose behind what you’re doing. How important? Pretty fuckin important if you work ~40 hours a week full-time for a good portion of your life. Studies show that happier people tend to be healthier people – of course you want to be healthy! So, you probably should be searching for happiness in your career as well as your life! We can do it by figuring out Rule #1: Know Thy Self…
Being C.E.O. of Y.O.U.R. Family – Part II
Congratulations, you’ve recently been promoted to the CEO of Y.O.U.R. Family. Let’s take another 20 year snapshot of your life. In this example, you make $75,000 per year. You are now in charge of a $1.5M, yes 1.5 titty fucking million dollar operation.
Happy 42o – Don’t let your future go up in smoke!
Try rolling these tips into action…
Write Your Goals:
According to a Harvard MBA goal study, 84% of one of their classes had not set goa
ls, 13% had written goals but no concrete plans, and 3% had goals and plans. 10 years later, the 13% with written goals were making 2x as much money as the 84% of the class with no goals. And, the 3% with written goals and a plan were making 10x as much as the other 97% of the class. If it isn’t already, your goal should be to set goals… Read more
Mortgages & Long-Term Investing:
*Sexy Alert: you will always save money on interest payments over the course of a 15 year mortgage versus a 30 year mortgage. Now, let’s look at the options of investing and paying down your mortgage!
Debt is a ticking time bomb!
Shit… Read more
Warren Buffett is one of the top 3 richest people in the WORLD and he lives a frugal life, so what’s your excuse?
ME-llennial Mistakes To Avoid
You don’t need a shiny crystal ball to forecast your exact future. But, you will benefit from a little planning so that you can better position yourself for flexibility to achieve your dreams while minimizing your risks.
The millennial generation is said to be self-absorbed, so start acting like it by taking care of yourself. Maximize your potential and minimize your regrets. Regrets? You know, like that one night in college when… ok we won’t go there. Read more
Student Loan Debt
You are probably close friends [or enemies] with student loans if you’ve hit that 4th year, 5th year…or maybe 6th year of college. Unlike Vegas, what happens at college often stays with you for over 10 years – not ideal.
So, what’s worse than graduating with the average student loan debt of ~$30,000? Answer: paying an additional $5,000-$10,000 of student loan interest. Here’s how you avoid this…
Double C’s (Credit Cards):
Double D’s are nice, tough argument. But, nothing gets me as excited as my cash back double C’s (credit cards). With so many credit card choices, it may be difficult to determine (1) if credit cards are right for you and (2) which one you should use!
Whether your preference is cash, points, or some mix and match… you need to know that YOU WIN when you’re in control. The CREDIT CARD COMPANY WINS most of the time, which is why they’re in business. So I’ll repeat, you must be in control. I don’t care how enticing the rewards program is, you will not benefit if you can’t consistently pay off your credit card debt on time. So…how do YOU win?!
Viagra for your credit isn’t something to be ashamed of, especially if you have trouble keeping it up. Unfortunately, your credit score impacts common loans that you may likely apply for throughout your life – think mortgages and auto loans. How would you like to save $50,000?
Making Your 401k Easier Than Your Prom Date
In today’s world, investing is a basic survival skill – if you don’t know how to work with money, then your survivability will literally be impacted. Here’s the bottom line… you probably don’t want to save 50% of your paycheck when you’re in your 50’s. Instead, we need to use the opportunity to invest in our 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s.
$10k saved at age 25 = $228,000 at age 70… Read more
Finding The Real G-Spot…
Are you stressed out about pleasing your woman? Well, you should be – that sh*t is important! But, if you’re stressed out about investing, then chances are… you’re doing it wrong. You need to stop “looking for the G-Spot” and start looking for the “Good Spot.” Sure, we all remember bragging about that one time we found the G-Spot. Well, were you lucky or good? Investing successfully is about removing the luck and doing the right things… Read more
Tits & Ass [Individual Retirement Accounts]
Ahh, the ever infamous question, “are you an ass man, or a boobs man?” It’s time to start enjoying both – the RIGHT way! We’re going to talk retirement (401k), IRAs (Traditional & Roth) and how using both can help you whoop taxes in the asses! It doesn’t matter if you’re a guy or a gal – you can still enjoy a nice pair of T&A, am I right?
Envy [The $300,000 Story]
The $300,000 story starts with your age, plan, and discipline.
Vibrators [Recharging Your Batteries]
Ahhh, you’ve done all your chores and dirty work for the day and it’s time to play. So, you pull out your little pal and say to yourself, “we’re not so different.” Fact is, we all need to be recharged from time to time. Life isn’t always a bucket of rainbows because some people feel the need to act like they only open yellow fuckin’ Starbursts. Take some time to recharge your batteries and remember that even Kendrick Lamar knows how important this is (b*tch, don’t kill my vibe-rator). Read more
Balls Deep [Hitting Financial Home Runs, Of Course]
We’ll finish strong with short-term and long-term goals, arguably the most important aspect of being a successful CEO. Are you ready to go balls deep? Well, before we start swinging for the fences, let’s round the bases. Read more
Sticking It In [Stock Market Investing]
I’m talking about the perfect, 10/10, sexiest opportunity that you’ve ever laid eyes on. You and everyone else is literally dying to stick it in. Why? Because emotions play a large role with investing. The problem with being a novice at sticking it in is that we typically only have the confidence to stick it in when EVERYONE else wants to stick it in.
Car insurance in your glove box? Check! Lubrication in your night stand? Check! Let me guess, you didn’t know there were similarities between insurance and lube? How about the fact that we need to have them, you know… just in case you’re getting fucked. Having nice lubrication will help you ease in and out of life’s tightest holes.
Condoms [Protection… B/c Emergencies Happen]
It’s a good idea to establish an emergency fund as an extra layer of protection between you and those assholes out there. Do you remember that one time, you know, when you had an emergency? Like the time when the condom broke? Then your girlfriend’s period didn’t come and you had a heart attack while driving to the store to buy Clearblue pregnancy tests? And once you get back home you wait anxiously for the happy ending like the climax of a Will Smith movie? Yeah. Fact is, life plans are like condoms… half the time you don’t use them, half the time they fail (math) – so that’s why you need a protection plan.
Dirty Little Action Steps:
1: Improve your savings: if you typically have $100 in savings, then let’s start by doubling that
2: Save up 1 month’s expenses (1 month’s expenses should include must pay bills, such as: rent, utilities, food, gas, car insurance, phone…). No clothing. No cable. No bull-shitty items.
3: Continue saving until you’re pretty damn comfortable, ideally with 3-6 months of living expenses
Dirty Little Secret:
No one likes using condoms, just like no one likes saving money for emergencies. I get it… I really do. But, this one is a no-brainer. An emergency fund will help you with an insurance deductible, loss of job, career change, car repair, etc.
Sex Ed Class Pt I [CEO Lessons]
Remember the Sexual Education assembly in your middle school gymnasium? Well, I do. Worst. Fucking. Assembly. Ever. Whether you’re talking about the birds and the bees or the P’s and the V’s, the purpose of sexual education is to know what the hell is going on here and why. If school never truly taught you how to budget, how to invest, or how to live your financial life, then we have some work to do.
Dirty Little Action Steps:
1: R.E.L.A.X.- whenever you’re overwhelmed with the complexities of your finances, it’s okay to relax and take a step back.
2: Goals Partner- Just like you turned to your friend to make jokes when you were uncomfortable at the assembly, it can be beneficial to have a goals partner – someone you can talk things through with.
Dirty Little Secret:
Remember, as the CEO, your job is to set goals and make slow, steady improvements. Unlike the bar down the road, you don’t just “get lucky” in finance. But, the good news is that you choose when you want your “financial magic” to happen because it starts with your everyday choices. And, it always has.